Valentine's day can go to hell and die.
Feb. 9th, 2002 09:34 pm![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
learning2flyI long for the day when I can listen to the opening chords of 'Shine on You Crazy Diamond' or 'Wish You Were Here' without falling to pieces.
could I be more pathetic than I am right now? Seriously!?!? I go to a party and cry at being reminded of how lonely I really am. I cry when Nate stops by for a surpise visit after not seeing him in ages.
Fucking Valentines day. Making me stop to think as I eat a hershey kiss that this is the only kiss I've gotten in almost two years. This is what I've been reduced to. Kisses in chocolate form.
Oh bloody freakin hell.
Please rid me of my ridiculous obsession with love.
I can't keep living like this. I can't keep clinging to my fairy tale/Romeo and Juliet dreams and ideals. It's never going to happen. I allowed myself to give my trust to one not trustworthy and now I pay the price. I'll never be the same again. Yet, I still dream of finding my true love. Who am I kidding? He's probably taken one look at me and walked away. I'm not worthy or deserving of anything that wonderful.
Still, I thirst for it with every fiber of my being.
round and round we go.
could I be more pathetic than I am right now? Seriously!?!? I go to a party and cry at being reminded of how lonely I really am. I cry when Nate stops by for a surpise visit after not seeing him in ages.
Fucking Valentines day. Making me stop to think as I eat a hershey kiss that this is the only kiss I've gotten in almost two years. This is what I've been reduced to. Kisses in chocolate form.
Oh bloody freakin hell.
Please rid me of my ridiculous obsession with love.
I can't keep living like this. I can't keep clinging to my fairy tale/Romeo and Juliet dreams and ideals. It's never going to happen. I allowed myself to give my trust to one not trustworthy and now I pay the price. I'll never be the same again. Yet, I still dream of finding my true love. Who am I kidding? He's probably taken one look at me and walked away. I'm not worthy or deserving of anything that wonderful.
Still, I thirst for it with every fiber of my being.
round and round we go.
![[identity profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/openid.png){kind=small}
*snugs*
Date: 2002-02-10 02:23 am (UTC)It gets better. I know that sounds all cliche and dumb and such, but it does. Don't let yourself get too cynical. You don't want to end up like me where even though you have things pretty good, your inherent cynicism makes you jumpy, confused, and generally a poor excuse for a girlfriend/person. I'd hate to see you end up like ole Pook here.
Chin up. Stay dreamy as long as you can. We need more of you around to balance out folks like me.
*Hugs tight*
WeeonaPookey